[Smart People for the lose]

I had never heard of Smart People before I got the email about passes, and I went because a) it was free, b) I didn’t have anything else to do that night, and c) the cast was so bizarre I had to see how it worked.

Answer: it didn’t.

Right from the start I was annoyed by glaring continuity errors, which for all the film I see I almost *never* notice. Would that that had been the least of my annoyance. But no. There was also a parade of utterly unlikeable characters. And I am not one to be generally down on unlikeable characters, if they’re well written. These weren’t. The only character I was interested in at all was Thomas Haden Church as the (adopted!) brother. Would have liked him better without the dreadful facial hair, but so it goes. And I did not for one minute buy Sarah Jessica Parker as a doctor. Nor did I buy her being interested in Dennis Quaid’s arrogant professor outside of an impressionable freshman crush. IF THAT.

It wasn’t as bad as In Bruges in this regard (well, what *could* be?) but it still paraded a number of derogatory “gay” comments, and played for laughs the possibility of being perceived as gay. I am unbelievably sick of shit like that. In some cases maybe one could argue that it said something about the character, such as when Page’s character jibes Church about his (non-existent) boyfriend. Maybe. But at the end, SPOILER ALERT Quaid and Church shop for baby things together, which was a visual gag, left to the audience to understand that O NOES! People will think they are gay! Let’s all laugh at them! Or let’s sit in the theater and fume. I know which one I picked.

It wrapped up with a sappy, unbelievable ending with characters taking virtual 90 degree turns. THAT DOES NOT QUALIFY AS AN ARC. I am just saying.

I hope people don’t see this and form a crap opinion of Ellen Page. In spite of being a perfectionist, SAT-obsessed Young Republican, her character had a startling amount in common with Juno, which is sad, because she can do so much more than the precocious, verbally advanced teen.

She did wear some really cute sweaters, though. Some hideous. But some cute. Still not worth seeing the movie for.

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